DISCLAIMER: New kind of post - let it all hang out!
Got up this morning, early as usual despite the vacation days. Looked in my inbox – got 4 orders on new items I posted yesterday, read Danielle Laporte's post and I am stoked! Every time I start asking “Why am I doing this” God seems to give me a sign. Danielle Laporte’s post inspired me, moved me and touched me. I want to feel like she does – crazy busy, in a mess, fighting with deadlines – but content – content with where she is. (Go over and read this post from her).
I rarely write just to write on my blog. But today like Danielle I am going to. It’s good to get a glimpse inside the a persons blog you have been reading for years. It’s not all art and fun and contacts all the time. There is real life surrounding all of this.
Been off work for 2 weeks now. Still a third to go. Haven’t been as constructive or prolific as I usually am. Time is not my friend. Time makes me think I have lots of time. I don’t want to feel like I have lots of time. I want to make every minute count. I want every minute to be purposeful, constructive mixed in with some happy and content times with my family.
My 13 ear old son is causing lots of grief these days. If any of you have been through the teenage years – give me advice! He’s taking the wrong path and it is breaking my heart. I don’t know how else to explain it. My heart is broken. I wish him as a little boy again, 5 or 6 and sweet and innocent. The innocence is still there – I just have to recapture it and let him know it is still there.
That is partially the cause for my lethargy these days. When things get real bad I generally dive into my art – right now I am somewhere in the middle. Trying to work out the puzzle and how to put the pieces back together.
I feel a sense of movement, a sense of change in my life. The day job has certainly taken a seat – a seat way way back. The time off my day job has given me perspective – perhaps a brief preview of what life could be like with just my art. It has shown me that I need to be more disciplined, make hours for my work and not assume I will get to it. Different pieces are lying on my studio floor, started so that I will be inspired, yet I am starting project after project to keep myself motivated. They will get finished in the next few days. That I have promised myself.
For all the journaling I have been doing with pictures – this has yet to be my most honest entry. I am going to start a new journal – the theme will be `Who do I want to be`. There is something about getting a little older in life that is sweet. You get to know much better who you want to be.
Have a happy weekend all – go read Danielle`s post and stay inspired. Love your life – let`s try to reach that place of contentment.
Cathy
